Monday, October 25, 2010

Matt Damon

Wow, I don't mean to get political or anything, but I just watched a youtube video from about 2 years ago when Matt Damon was scared of Sarah Palin being president because he didn't know anything about her and she'd only been Governor of Alaska for 2 years. What a weird statement for him to make. The only thing anyone knew about Obama as he was running for President is that he wrote a book singing his own praises and barely showed up to be a senator in IL. Note to all interested parties: if you're going to condemn one politician, use the same standards to judge the others.

Actors: we pay for our movie tickets to see you ACT like regular, thoughtful, intelligent individuals. We don't expect you to actually be that way. Stick with movies so that you won't upset me with your opinions and force me to boycott some pretty good movies.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

McDonalds Steriotypes

I love superheros. I love the guys that are morally incorruptable, can leap buildings in a single bound, have a secret identity, and basically are just perfect. McDonalds now has superhero figures in their happy meals and I think it's great. Who doesn't love Wolverine?

Unfortunately, everytime I go to order a happy meal with the superheros in it, they ask me if I want a boy toy or a girl toy. I want a girl toy. I want little figures of superheros. I don't need strangly shaped kittens or puppies. I have real kittens and puppies. But if I say "Girl Toy" they are going to think I want the wierd pink animals. Is it ungirllike to like superheros?

I think it's great that they have choices. People come in all different shapes and sizes with different interests, but why can't they ask me, "Do you want a superhero or a pet thing?" Wouldn't that question be more appropriate.

I understand that mostly it's boys that like the superheros. That's great. Boys can like them for their reasons, I'll like them for mine.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Gyms

Okay, so I bought a gym membershipin February! How great is that. Everyone rolled their eyes when I got this as though I wasn't going to use it. But I thought for sure that having the money go out each month would encourage me to make use of my membership.

Day one...go in to work out and the workout schedule the facility trainer made for me is missing...oh well...goof around for 30 minutes and leave.

Day two (two weeks later)...have the schedule, lighted the weights and reps cause there is no trainer to know if I'm cheating.

Day three (Mid-March)...go to an abs class at the gym. It's my only free wednesday. I won't be able to go back again.

Day four(end of April)...Actually wake up in the morning and run on the treadmill, do the weight machines and crunches! yeah! Take a shower and arrive to work on time.

Day Five (End of May)...facility manager calls me at work to talk about an event he wants to work with the city on (I work for the city) and takes the opportunity to put me on a guilt trip about my lack of attendence. I go in! Yeah me!

Day Six...I'm looking toward June. Not bad for $30 a month.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Oscars

Let's be honest, who really cares about what prizes the movie stars give each other? I watch the movies I want to watch. End of story. Their opinion on their own work doesn't mean a thing to me. I'll start caring about what awards they give themselves when they start going out of their way to care about what awards my business associates give to each other.

And it's not like they need awards to feel like their work is validated. Their fat checks ought to do the trick. If you don't feel validated after you're given 10 million dollars for 4 months of work, you've got bigger issues than a frame on the wall will solve.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Political Soapbox

Let's be honest, elections stink. Campaigns turn into smear campaigns even if the politician doesn't start it. I dispise watching these videos on U-tube that cut and edit speeches to change the meaning. It's an obvious attack on a fellow human being and idiots are doing it on both sides of the fence. What happened to what our parents taught about being the bigger person?

I have to admit, something about O'bama makes me uneasy (maybe it's the fact that the media is falling over their tonges in his wake), but I don't feel like seeing a bunch of lies being spread about him. Pictures that were obviously faked, stories that are outragious lies. The same thing is happening to McCain. COME ON PEOPLE!! The only people these falacies turn me against is the people producing them. Are they out for a good laugh? Do they think we'll be swayed one way of the other? Do they think we believe that pictures that come over the email haven't been digitally altered?

Okay, so some people are swayed by this. A lot of people actually, but this is a huge decision. People should have all the facts, the correct facts and be able to make an intelligent decision. Instead, we're left to question everything presented to us. Are the politicians sharing thier own views or the views their campaign manager wants them to share? Are they changing their mind or temporarliy changing their stance? Do they have the courage to stand up for what they believe in spite of the media backlash? Are they just smooth talkers or can they actually accomplish what they spout. Will they leave the American people the freedom to accomplish their own success?

For anyone who reads this, please note: I want the freedom to succeed. I want to be in charge of my own money and how I use that money to help the world. Don't spew me a load of garbage on helping "poor people." I help those around me to the best of my ability with what little funds I have. I don't give money to people who expect my charity, and I don't want my fellow Americans to be reliant on other people's goodwill. You're an American. That means you pick yourself up, and you make it happen. The government is responsible for our safety from foreign nations and the harmony with which our communities should run. The rest is up to you. That's what's so great about America. So, instead of spouting Change. I want to hear someone saying, we're going to put more emphasis on what already makes this nation great! "Accentuate the Positive!"

As with all thoughts on politics, this could lead off in 50 different directions, so I'll leave you with this: "Stand porter at the door."

Monday, August 25, 2008

Movie vs Books

I love how people always think that it's so much better to be a person who reads books all the time, as opposed to a person who spends their time watching movies. Readers are viewed as ubber intelligent and deep thinkers. These are people who use their minds as opposed to being fed entertianment through a bube tube. They have deep thoughts and educated views. Yeah right! People! We're usually reading Fiction!! Our minds are being swayed to the bias of the authors, and it's so subtle that we don't even know it's happening!

Let's be totally honest, when I get to reading a good book (usually fiction) nothing else matters to me. It will take at least one evening, usually more, to read the whole book and nothing else will get done. My animals are downright relieved that I remember to feed them on these occasions. I'm pretty sure most of my high school teachers would be shocked to know how often I was holding a book under my desk as I pretended to follow along with their lecture. The only way I got through college was to leave my books in OK while I went to school in IL.

Books are just as consuming and adictive as movies, but they last 10 times longer. While your average movie is over in 2 hours with the heroin or hero living happily ever after (or everyone is dead and gone - depending on you entertainment preferences), after 2 hours of a book, you've just gotten aquanted with the main characters and the basic setting. The movie goer has now moved on to doing the laundry and vacuuming the house, while the reader has moved onto the couch for more comfort. Now, who's got the healthy lifestyle?

And as for this ubber intelligent rumor, let's take a look at a prime example. Henry McCarty, a.k.a. Billy the Kid. He was a huge reader all through his youth. That's how he spent his free time. Historians believe he was a very smart individual with a ton of potential. Here's my thought: If he was really that smart, he would have made it past the age of 21. The idiot did everything he could to get into trouble and then never had the sense enough to think "Wow, I only stole some laundry and I'm only a teenager, maybe they won't string me up for this offense." So, he breaks out of jail and his life is just one big spiral of bad decisions. Reading does not create intelligence.

So, should you put down the books and just watch movies? No. Just be careful who we put on a pedestal and why.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

The Stupidity of Buying Journals

Okay, so the entire human population is looking for a way to express themselves as individuals. We have our own personalities and our own ideas and we need other people to realize how special we are. There needs to be some record left for generations to come that we had a deep thought while sitting by ourselves one evening. Enter - the Journal. Every whatnot store has a ton of them. They come in all different sizes and colors. You can get them with a picture of your favorite movie characters or wresting heroes. They can look professional, Bohemian, or - my favorite - deep. Yes, Deep. I love it when they look as though they already have knowledge seeping from the binding.

So we purchase our Journal, take it home and start to write. However, before we can get to the deep thoughts, we must first spend half an hour writing a special note to the future generation that will come across this Journal and be drawn to its seeping intellectual stimulus. The note says something along the lines of "I'm going to document my time as a coach," or "I am just expanding on all the uniquely random ideas that come into my head (because of course, no one else has ever thought of them)." Then you have to write three pages on your place in life, including age, career and family. The future generations need this!!

Alas, your time has run out. Your writing hand, accustomed to doing no more that signing a random document in this age of computers, is beginning to cramp. Your bedside clock is warning you that it will set off an obnoxious buzz in five short hours, at which time, you will have no choice but to get up and head to your not-so-deep everyday life. No worries - you intend to write again tomorrow evening. You'll get an earlier start so you won't feel pressure to turn off the light and sleep.

Day two. YEAH!! This evening you are going to write deep thoughts. You can tell they are just waiting to burst out. Unfortunately, dinner with the family ran late. Then everyone wanted to play the new Scene-It board game and you hit the mattress and closed your eyes. BUT WAIT!!! You can't neglect your journal so quickly. An entry of "Dinner with fam was fun. Have to run errand tomorrow," will have to suffice.

In the fine tradition of errands, you are run out of energy on day three and completely forget the journal.

Day seven. "Oh yeah...there's a Journal lying beside the bed. I'll write in it." How you feel you must tell the future generations more about the family dinner and errands and why you've neglected your journal for the past week. Once again, you've run out of steam and the deep thoughts are put on hold.

Three months down the road, you half-heartedly pick up your Journal again. You get part-way through the update, lose interest and turn on your favorite Mel Gibson flick.

Three more months sweep by. You don't know where the time went, but in a fury of self-improvement energy, you start spring-cleaning. You take the four-foot high pile of books from beside your bed and put them back in your library (I'm referring to the small four-shelf unit in the family room). When you come across the journal, you sigh in remorse and haul it to your library as well. The potentially - could have been - still may one day be - intellectually filled journal is placed between your high school journal analyzing the works of William Shakespeare and the extra flowery journal given to you by Aunt May, in which you made a few feeble attempts at bad poetry.

So ends the saga of yet another Journal. Don't worry, you will repeat this again when you start a new hobby, take an exotic vacation or watch Finding Forester.